it feels like you are caught in quicksand. you were crazy enough to think that the trip to where the quicksand was was worth everything. then you realized it wasn't so. the reason why you thought that way almost doesn't stand anymore.
with one leg caught in it.. there's no way you can get out. you are filled with reluctance.. who wants to die anyway? but you don't have a choice.. you thus can only see yourself being buried altogether... and you stop breathing with a hint of regret.
maybe that's how things are most of the time. you don't see it coming and when it does.. it hits you straight in the face. or maybe you saw it coming and you thought you could handle it. well it of course turns out that you can't.
dreams don't come true for everyone. not at the same time at least. so you win some, you lose some. i lost my freedom and i won depression, regret and insecurity. good deal.
listening to: utada hikaru - dareka no negai ga kanau koro
whatever you want here
