lolz. i didn't realize how long it was since my last post until my hyung-su told me... well.. so let me give my mind a big run-through...
school has started... but as it started and as i face the new school semester... i was hit by news that i may have problems with my health. because of that particular health test i took.. it turned out that i have liver and kidney problems. i was made to test my blood again... and if everything was clear.. i can live in peace.. if they ring me up again... i have problems.
they rang again and for four days... i lived with the thought that i was going to die. perhaps in the next hundred days. then i was thinking what i would do in hundred days... i would quit nus.. i would use all my savings and for the first and last time of my life... board a plane and zoom myself off to japan and korea. i'd most probably not have the chance to see shinhwa in my life... that would be the biggest regret so far. then i also started thinking. i'm 20. i'm dying and i haven't been in love. that would be the next biggest regret. i didn't dare to tell anyone but my siblings and though i said i wasn't afraid, i cried silently in the night... as i fear closing my eyes. maybe i wouldn't even have a hundred days.
but then of course.. everything turned out fine.. won't go into details but rest assure that i'm fit and healthy. okay.. i have a lousy lifestyle.. but i'm trying to change.
i took up archery... and now have a big bruise on my arm... but one of the members say i have the potential so i stayed on... which means i'll lose my fair skin soon. dam i'd better start stocking up on sunscreen....
hyung-su's making me nostalgic... i suddenly remembered a lot of things from the past... the days where nice and nasty stuffs happened.... there were laughter, there were tears. i miss those days... however crappy they are.
and then i started to wonder.. something which always comes to my mind once in a while...
if you hadn't let go.. what would have happened?
i would either be very happy now... happier than ever. or i would be very bitter.
somehow... i'm glad you did. because i don't think you did what you did because of that.
listening to: keane -- bedshaped
whatever you want here
